In May, I participated in Panache
DeSai’s 33 day program online with his new book - “Discovering Your Soul
Signature.” One thing about doing
spiritual work, anything that needs to be released comes up. In my case, deep childhood emotional wounds of
rejection and abandonment came to the surface once again.
Those feelings started with being adopted at 2 1/2. My
new Mother told me over and over again as I was growing up that I wasn't
wanted, that my birth mother had rejected me from the day I was born, and was
always trying to find a way to get rid of me. Then on a recent Saturday afternoon I got a
big envelope in the mail from my brother. He had found something in my
late Father’s things he thought I might want. He sent me the file from my
adoption.
In the file were various legal briefs and as I turned the
pages I discovered three letters from my birth mother to my new father. She
wrote about her hesitation to sign the adoption papers, (It took her 9 months) how hard it was to let
go, and her love of me in each one of them.
She wrote that even though her heart was breaking, she believed the
adoption would be for the best.
My first thought was "I've been living a lie all these years!" I HAD been wanted and loved. I wasn’t rejected or abandoned!
My first thought was "I've been living a lie all these years!" I HAD been wanted and loved. I wasn’t rejected or abandoned!
Something shifted at the very core
of my being. I haven't totally groked what's happened, nor can I explain it, but
I know it's good. I feel lighter in many ways.
I also realized once again, that
life really is a series of stories. We begin writing them as little children
based on what others say and how we feel about it. We really are the writer, the actor,
the director and the producers of our reality. As we write, the Universe constantly rearranges Itself to fit
our picture of reality. We get to live
our original stories over and over again. In fact we add to those stories
daily.
I started to think about the stories
I am telling myself now. Are they
positive and uplifting? Are they stories
of love and wonder and delight in life?
They’d better be! These stories are creating my future.
How about you? Your stories are creating your future as
well. If you want to know what your
stories are, look around and listen to your self talk. That ongoing dialogue and its accompanying
feelings are a vibration that sets the Law of Attraction in action. As the
writer, the director, the actor, and the producer, you have a built in rewrite
option that can be used at any time.
Each of our stories is adding to the
collective consciousness of humanity.
Our rewrite option is so important now.
Thank God we’re such creative beings!
Join me in writing the greatest Love Story ever.
AFFIRMATIVE PRAYER
God is Love. God being omnipresent means Love is
absolutely everywhere, therefore. Love is what I am made of and who I am. As I
know this for myself, I know it for everyone.
There is nothing but Love.
I am open to feeling all of my
feelings and letting them move through me with ease and grace. I am open to the
mysteries and wonder of our world. I have turned the page and started a new
chapter. I honor my old stories and joyfully write new ones that reflect the
beauty and Love of all Life.
With a light heart, a clear head and
a pure heart, I gratefully release these words to Divine Law, knowing they have
been lovingly embodied and have uplifted my whole being! And so it is.
2 comments:
Angelica, stopping by from Lacy's Sacred Journey site and found this post. It is so beautiful! Your story of abandonment resonates with me, as my father voluntarily stepped out of my life at 13 years old. "We really are the writer... of our reality... listen to your self talk." Things I always need to hear! I will be saving your beautiful affirmative prayer. Thanks for your words! -Leslie
Thank you Leslie! Blessings to you for reading and taking the time to commment.
Angelica
Post a Comment